Best Of Tucson®

The End-of-the-World Exit Interview: Diana Teran

Diana Teran, co-owner of La Tauna Tortillas, said she and her husband, Francisco Moreno, work various hours in their home to make their vegan tortillas. They started selling them at the Santa Cruz Farmers’ Market, and now sell them at the Food Conspiracy Co-op and Sprouts. The La Tauna best-seller is the olive-oil tortilla, but the slightly spicy chiltepin version comes in a close second. In Tucson, the concept of vegan tortillas usually means no lard—and, therefore, no taste. “We started off wanting these to be healthy, but they had to taste good,” Teran said. For more on La Tauna, go to lataunatortillas.com.

A meteor is going to hit the planet tomorrow. Where in Tucson would you go for your final meal?

Sher-E-Punjab. It’s a mom-and-pop Indian restaurant. It feels so homey, and you can tell the food doesn’t come out of a can. Plus, you just walk in, and it transports you. It’s one of my favorite restaurants in Tucson.

Our new robot overlords want to ban alcohol. Where would you want to have your final drink?

I don’t drink alcohol, so I can’t think of an alcoholic drink. My final drink would probably be water. With the robots coming, I’d want to have a drink of water, at peace in my home. I know it’s boring. I used to drink caffeine, but gave it up. I’m just a water-drinking person.

Global warming has increased outside temps to 130 degrees in the summer. Where do you go to cool off?

I would definitely take a short drive to Madera Canyon and enjoy the much-cooler weather. It’s so close, and not many people know about it. Also, the change in temperature is so amazing. I love to go up there when it starts to get hot.

Aliens have landed in your backyard and say: “Take us to your leader." Where in Tucson would you send them?

I would direct them to City Hall and let Mr. Rothschild deal with them. He’s the mayor; he’s got to take care of us. It’s his job, right?

The mole people are invading the surface world through a tunnel that opens in your backyard. What local business would you turn to for help?

Casa Concrete, so they can pour concrete over my entire yard. That way, (the mole people) have no access to my property. I would also redirect them with a map to end up at City Hall, and let Mr. Rothschild deal with them.

If a zombie apocalypse were to happen in Tucson, what shopping center would you like to hole up in?

El Con Mall. It’s not very crowded. First, I’d have the whole place to myself. I like it there, and there’s food, so I’d be able to eat.

What Tucson band or musician would you want to write the soundtrack to the end of the world as we know it?

I would chose Los Changuitos Feos (de Tucson). They are a youth mariachi group. I really like the kids and how they are working. There’s a lot of creativity and talent there.

If you had only one sunset left in Tucson, from where would you watch it?

From the roof of my house with my family.