Police dispatch

These Boots Are Made for Dodging Traffic

Foothills Area

Oct. 25, 7:11 p.m.

A woman was found on the roadside screaming nonsensically, propelling herself into traffic and "talking about god" as if she were on some sort of crazy drug—but the only substance found on her person was marijuana, according to Pima County Sheriff's Department report.

An anonymous individual told dispatch that a woman was in a north-side neighborhood walking around "making delirious comments ... (and) yelling and screaming and carrying on," allegedly extremely high. The reporter said he gave her water at her request, but "she was still scaring the kids" in the area. She was described as blond and wearing a pink-striped shirt and boots—in which she was repeatedly running into the street and jumping in front of cars.

A deputy found her pacing purposefully (but purposelessly) up and down the street. When he tried to stop her and question her condition, she yelled at him and wouldn't respond to his questions, only making nonsensical statements and acting maniacal. She then tried to ignore the officer and continue walking, "as though she was in a complete state of altered consciousness and delirium and was screaming and hollering, causing a disruption in the neighborhood."

The deputy placed her in double-locked handcuffs to prevent her from leaping in the path of any more fast-moving vehicles. He told her she was only being detained for her security, but when he tried to seat her in his patrol vehicle, she struggled hard to escape and screamed additional "nonsensical and peculiar" comments, further disturbing local residents.

After much fighting and kicking on her part—and much coercing and gentle force on the part of several deputies—she finally found herself in the back seat of a patrol car, with her feet restrained and a "spit hood" over her head. She was screaming the whole time deputies were securing her, while "plenty of people were standing in their front yards watching this spectacle."

She was "very sweaty," still yelling and now banging her head against the car's window, answering inquiries with pure "gibberish."

The arresting deputy decided to send her to Northwest Hospital, but once an ambulance arrived, the woman had apparently become comfortable in the cop car, refusing to exit until another deputy finally persuaded her. Once out in the open again, she began thrashing around so hard that EMTs had to strap her to a gurney and sedate her.

After she'd departed in the ambulance, deputies looked through her purse to see what kind of bizarre drug she was apparently on, and probably carrying—but all they found was a small container of marijuana, along with a pipe and lighters.

When deputies called the unfortunate hospital staff to follow up on her condition, they learned that her mental status hadn't changed. The report gave no further information.