Police Dispatch

ALL HOURS ARE VISITING HOURS (FOR METH HEADS)

FOOTHILLS AREA

APRIL 5, 4:34 A.M.

A man who was detained after he tried to enter a medical facility at 4 a.m.—and then started yelling that a loved one had been kidnapped by meth dealers and terrorists—turned out to be a meth user himself, a Pima County Sheriff's Department report stated.

The man told deputies that he had gone to the facility to visit friends, but couldn't explain why he thought that might be possible at 4 in the morning. An employee of the facility told deputies that she recognized the man from a previous encounter when he had come to the facility apparently seeking help, but then had refused treatment and started screaming at her. She said she also believed that the man, who had been banned from the facility, had stolen a bag filled with sheets, dishes and other facility property.

As deputies handcuffed the man, he rambled on loudly about his partner having been "kidnapped by methamphetamine dealers and terrorists" and insisted there was an "ongoing conspiracy" against him.

He cited the conspiracy when deputies found a meth pipe in his belongings. But after first denying ownership of the pipe, he eventually admitted that it was his and that he'd been using it to smoke meth for the past 24 hours.

NO FAN OF RULES ... OR ROADS

EAST BENSON HIGHWAY

MARCH 3, 5:29 P.M.

A young man spray-painted his opinion on a traffic sign, but the placement of the graffiti on the sign resulted in a mixed message, according to a PCSD report.

A caller told deputies that a teenage male driving a blue pickup truck had pulled over near a sign that said, "Like this road? Then slow down." The caller said the male got out of the truck with a bottle of spray paint in hand and scrawled "No" on the sign.

But whether he was giving his opinion on the road or on the command to slow down was unclear: Did the altered sign say, "Like this road? No. Then Slow Down" or "Like this road? Then slow down. No."

The caller had given the deputies the license plate number for the man's pickup, but when they went to the address listed for the owner, the place appeared to be uninhabited. The case remained unresolved at the time of the report.