Police Dispatch

NOT APPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN

WEST DREXEL ROAD, AUG. 12, 5:55 P.M.

A grown man earned a felony charge after hiding dangerous drugs in a container sporting a popular cartoon character, according to a Pima County Sheriff's Department report.

A southwest-side homeowner called the Sheriff's Department and said he had reason to believe that his live-in brother had a warrant out for his arrest—and that he might be in possession of crystal methamphetamine.

Deputies met with the reportee at a market near his house, where he told them that his young son had been playing in the subject's room, where he found a SpongeBob SquarePants tin. Inside the tin, the reportee said, was a baggie containing something that looked like "pieces of broken rice," which the man believed to be methamphetamine.

Deputies at the residence met with the brother and immediately handcuffed and interrogated him. Specifically, they demanded that he tell them what he knew about a certain SpongeBob SquarePants box.

The subject admitted that the box was his and that it contained crystal meth. Deputies confirmed this after finding the box and testing its contents.

The subject was arrested for drug-possession.


STRONG WORDS IMPLYING STRONG TEETH

NORTH KATAPA TRAIL, AUG. 13, 4:59 A.M.

A drunk young male, wearing only underwear, made an odd threat to law-enforcement officers after getting kicked out of his own home, a PCSD report stated.

Deputies responded to a call that was apparently from the subject's mother. She said her 19-year-old son was violently pounding on the door of the family's residence. He was allegedly trying to break in after getting kicked out for being intoxicated and disorderly.

Deputies found the subject outside the house—sweat-soaked, bloody and wearing nothing but a T-shirt and boxer shorts—and handcuffed him after a notable struggle.

Inside the house, deputies found a large hole in the door to one of the bedrooms, presumably made by the subject with his bare hands and/or a knife.

The subject refused to answer deputies' questions, simply yelling, "Fuck you; you can talk to my lawyer!" He was described as sometimes being cooperative and innocently asking questions about what was going on, and then suddenly screaming at deputies. He apparently wouldn't stop demanding that deputies speak to his lawyer (whose existence was never proven). At one point, the subject loudly threatened to "eat (the deputies') badges."

He was booked into jail on multiple charges.