The big question left unanswered by Colombiana is: Why does anyone think a sexed-up, gun-toting exploitation/revenge flick should be rated PG-13? Sure, it probably comes close to fulfilling a lot of teenage boys’ dreams to see Zoe Saldana packing heat and wearing only underwear, but beyond that … really, why is this thing rated PG-13? Saldana plays Cataleya, who, as a child, saw her mobster parents murdered by a rival gangster. And you know exactly where it goes from there. Saldana has been in some bad action movies since Star Trek and Avatar; first, there was last year’s The Losers and Takers, which aren’t as indistinguishable as they sound, and now there’s Colombiana, which wastes a real opportunity to showcase Saldana’s action chops. Or anything else, for that matter.
Director: Olivier Megaton
Producer: Luc Besson and Ariel Zeitoun
Cast: Zoe Saldana, Jordi Mollà, Lennie James, Michael Vartan, Cliff Curtis, Beto Benites, Amandla Stenberg, Jesse Borrego, Cynthia Addai-Robinson, Angel Garnica, Ofelia Medina, Callum Blue, Sam Douglas, Graham McTavish, Charles Maquignon and Afif Badra