by Jim Nintzel
Jim Terr sends along his platform:
I’m Jim Terr. I’ve been a proud Republican all my life. Just like I’ve been a proud resident or Arizona all my life.
Terr—pronounced as in “termite.” The meaning and ethnic origin is unknown. But of course we in Arizona don’t care about that. We care about a person’s inner worth, their willingness to play hard and work by the rules. I mean work hard and play by the rules. Inner worth, I’ve got a lot of that.
When my parents or maybe it was my grandparents, came here, this was just a dusty desert filled with a few cactus and a few so-called Native Americans. They built this up to the thriving, sprawling water-sucking paradise that it is today, where people of all kinds live together in peace and harmony.
I have that same vision for America. Won’t you join me? This is a people’s campaign. In fact I don’t even want to run. But people from all over America said “Mitt, will you run?” (Somehow his e-mail account was diverted to mine for about 36 hours, but it got me to thinking…)
Of course I should run. America needs me. I’ve got nothing better to do between now and November. Maybe I’ll win. I know I can count on the support of the little people. In fact, I’m not going to accept contributions of anything greater than $25,000 per individual or family or corporation. Actual campaign contribution limits may even smaller than that. So you see, this is about you, about taking America back.
Back from the Obamas, from the Lockheeds, from the Wall Streets, from the Bushes, the Rockefellers, the Illuminati and the Bilderbergs. Let’s return it to the Garcias, the Terrs, the Joneses. (Are there any Joneses anymore?) The Washingtons, the Lincolns, the Jeffersons. Where ARE the Washingtons, the Lincolns, the Jeffersons, today? I’ll tell you where, they’re all playing professional basketball. That’s an old joke I’ve always loved.
This campaign isn’t about being politically correct, so you’d better get used to it. It’s not about appealing to the most far-right, ignorant, fundamentalist xenophobes in Iowa, in order to win a caucus and show how far-right, ignorant, fundamentalist and xenophobic I am. It’s about appealing to the most far-right, ignorant, fundamentalist xenophobes in the great state of Arizona, because I know we represent the best America has to offer; we embody a vision of what America can be again.
Those who say America was never meant to be a Christian country, I say let them prove it. Where are the documents? Where is the birth certificate of this so-called Thomas Jefferson, this so-called George Washington? I think a lot of Americans need to just shut up and let nature take its course. Let me run this place. Give Jim Terr a chance to steal from you!
If nominated I will not run, and if elected I will not serve. That is my solemn promise to you. I will issue shriveling indictments of any candidate or incumbent — for any office — who does not reject and eschew our current rotten system of private — and now, unlimited and secret corporate — contributions to election campaigns. I could make many more specific promises but we all know they are forgotten when you get in that presidential hot seat, so who are we kidding? I promise to do my best, and consult with my trusted circle of Wall Street advisers at every critical juncture.
In the coming weeks I’ll be sharing more about myself, and my vision of an America returned to its rightful owners. The corporations. That’s who knows how to run America like a business. Which is what our Founders intended. Of course corporations are human. It’s people I wonder about.
Together, we can work together for a better America. At least for me. Won’t you join me? Together we can take America back. Way back. God bless us all in this mighty endeavor.
Jim Terr is a native New Mexican who ’til recently lived (for 23 years) in Santa Fe. He is a singer, songwriter, satirist, and a video producer whose YouTube channel (HYMIEHYMIE) has over 400 videos and over 700,000 views. He is also an actor, who recently had a part in a Dutch indie film with Holly Hunter.
Jim Terr's work has aired on the ABC, CBS, NBC/Mutual, Westwood One, BBC (British) and National Public Radio networks, Air America, Voice of America, the Larry King, Jim Bohannon, G. Gordon Liddy, Jim Hightower, Paul Harvey, Thom Hartmann, Peter Werbe, Mike Malloy, Dr. Demento, "Mountain Stage," Sam Seder, Jon Elliott, "This Way Out" and "Whaddya Know?" radio shows, NBC- and CBS-TV News, in film, and has been broadcast in over 20 countries. He wrote and performed the national jingle favorite, "Sing a Song of Snapple." (See http://www.bluecanyonproductions.com/satire.html#credits )
His personal / professional website is http://www.JimTerr.com
At the top of his beefs, politically, is corporate and PAC funding of political campaigns, and the need for public campaign financing. Since no senator, congressman, or major presidential aspirant that he's aware of is advocating for this very obvious need, he thinks they are all basically full of shit on the most glaring issue. Hence he is running in the Arizona primary February 28, as a Republican just for added comedy value. He plans to do a feature film featuring, in part, his presidential run; trailer here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DcHQzbXx2jo