Your Friday Morning News Update

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-- So it seems some U.S. troops were forced to retreat from an area near the Mexico border after a group of armed individuals approached them. Gads. What is the United States now? Like, France?

-- Marilyn Manson's getting a divorce. Does anyone care? Anyone? No? OK, let's move on.

-- If you're staying at the Hilton Suites in Phoenix, don't let the bedbugs bite.

-- And finally, today, the Star's "Thorns and Flowers" spent almost 200 words babbling about how freakin' hilarious it was that a Goldwater Institute report used the phrase "jumping the shark." We suggest the Star needs to 1) get out more, and 2) perhaps get laid. This phrase may have been new and fresh, oh, seven years ago. But funny? Um, yikes. And then there's the matter of WHY IS THIS FODDER FOR THE STAR'S OPINION SECTION?

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