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Police Dispatch

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SCROTUM SIGHTING

NORTH STRATTON SADDLE TRAIL

NOV. 1, 4:08 P.M.

A foothills-area woman got an eyeful of her elderly male neighbor nude from below the belt, according to a Pima County Sheriff's Department report.

She told a deputy she'd been driving home when she saw the man—an older gentleman who lived alone—in his garage, wearing only a white shirt. She said he was bending over so that his rear faced the street and she "could see his penis, scrotum and anus." The woman said she was worried that children might see the spectacle.

When the deputy went to the man's house, the man was fully clothed and adamantly denied ever appearing otherwise to passers-by.

But the man admitted that someone had made the same allegation about him previously—though he was found "not guilty" in court.

No citations were issued.

COURTHOUSE JUSTICE

SAN XAVIER BEAT

OCT. 31, 2:54 P.M.

In an unconscious act of irony, a drunken man peed outside a local courthouse like a wild animal just before he was supposed to go inside to try to clear himself of an animal-cruelty charge, a PCSD report said.

A deputy who had been in the courthouse testifying was stopped by a security guard regarding an unruly, intoxicated man who had urinated on the courthouse steps. The deputy found the man, who reeked of alcohol, and asked him how much he'd had to drink. The man at first remained silent, but then he denounced two witnesses to his urination as "liars."

The man said he was at the courthouse to get two warrants dismissed that had been issued against him for failure to appear regarding an animal-cruelty allegation.

He was jailed on suspicion of indecent exposure and other charges.

EMPTY-HEADED THREATS

SAN XAVIER BEAT

OCT. 10, 3:58 P.M.

An intoxicated man threatened a convenience-store employee after stubbing his toe while on store property, according to a PCSD report.

A deputy was dispatched to a Circle K, where the cashier said a strange man had been hanging around the store for about two hours and acting drunk or high. The man finally entered the store, proclaimed loudly that he had stubbed his toe (perhaps trying to imply liability on the part of the store) and demanded to use the restroom.

Told that the restroom was for employees only, the man allegedly "made a scene" that ended with the man telling the cashier, "You will get it after work."

The man was still at large at the time of the report.

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