WIFE'S NIGHT OFF
WEST VALENCIA ROAD
AUG. 2, 6:39 P.M.
A man was arrested after allegedly stealing from a convenience store and harassing customers with some bad dancing, according to a Pima County Sheriff's Department report.
The clerk at a southwest-side Circle K stated that a 280-pound Hispanic male wearing only one shoe entered the store and began frolicking around and bothering the customers. He was apparently doing some sort of "belly dance," repeatedly lifting his shirt to expose his expansive torso. At one point, he tried to buy a Snickers bar with a collection of bubble-gum wrappers he had in his pocket. The next time he entered the store, he walked out with a 32-ounce soda without paying for it. When all was said and done, he had been asked to leave the premises four times; he had also apparently been drinking heavily.
Deputies found the man passed out near a trashcan, still with the one shoe on. A search came up negative for the stolen soda; however, a suspiciously fresh-looking 32-ounce cup was found in the nearby trashcan. The man was arrested.
En route to jail, the subject insisted he had only stolen 4 ounces of Powerade for his son. Soon after, he said he had only taken 4 ounces of water for his daughter. He was reportedly upset that he had to go to jail, because "it ruined his plans for later that night."
Just after deputies left the Circle K with the subject, his wife arrived on the scene and asked if he was going to jail. Told he was, she said cryptically, "That's good. He's probably better off there tonight."
NATURIST IN NATURE
NORTH SABINO CANYON PARKWAY
JULY 29, 9:42 A.M.
A woman seeking quiet recreation in Sabino Canyon was forced to watch a nude man jogging, a PCSD report stated.
The reportee said she was driving through the Sabino Canyon Recreation Area on a dirt road when she saw a male clad in only jogging shorts taking a run just off the road. When she got closer, she saw him stop and sit down on a large rock, and then stare at her as he proceeded to remove his shorts. She said he appeared to have been waiting for her to approach before taking his shorts off.
After he was nude, he continued his run down the road.
The woman said she did not feel threatened, but had been told by park officials to make a report with the Sheriff's Department.