In the end ... there will be no words in which to express it. So your spouse sends you to the store to return something bought the previous weekend. On the drive to the store, you're trying to come up with a plausible reason as to why it's being returned. Maybe a story with pirates in it, or aliens (the District 9 kind, not landscapers). But you walk up to the customer-service window, and they just take the item and give you a refund. They don't even want to hear the story! It's a good story; Winston Smith would be proud of how you rewrote history. But Kohl's doesn't care.
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